Madonna will guest star on next season’s Nip/Tuck, which suits both the show’s unabashed ridiculousness and Madonna’s non-acting career perfectly. She’ll probably strip and get humiliated by Julian McMahon’s Dr. Troy, which, admittedly, could be amusing. If anything, the woman does remain well-toned. Then, she can write a another shambolic children’s book to cleanse herself of her sins. Again. Catholic guilt never dies. Not even Kabbalah can kill it.