If you didn’t know all along that George Michael was gay, you’re gay. I mean, come on, have you seen the video for Wham’s “Wake Me Up before You Go Go?” That was the biggest coming out party I’ve ever seen. Some people still pretended to act surprised when Michael finally admitted he preferred a little extra hair in his brown starfish expeditions. In terms of his career, however, a closeted George Michael sold way more records and was arrested far less than the “out” version has. It’s difficult to balance fame and fortune and your wanton desire to cruise park bathrooms for an anonymous hand job. Who better to exploit such behavior than Ricky Gervais, who has asked Michael to star in the final episode of his TV show, Extras, as, get this, a “sex-crazed stoner.” Michael’s un-ironic piss-taking is a brave choice, considering most of the guest stars on Extras usually pretend to be darkly exaggerated versions of their public personas.