For a band that lost any semblance of credibility years, albums, and haircuts ago, Metallica must be a glutton for punishment by continuing to trot out new material. In a deftly worded statement, drummer Lars Ulrich claims, “these new songs echo some of our stuff from the ’80s – long, epic journeys through different musical landscapes, heavier, but a lot more melodic.” Uh huh. So, what else is he going to say? “Man, the new stuff, you know, turds up your speakers, you know, just like St. Anger did. It sounds like throwing an aluminum trash can down a flight of stairs but with auto-tune!” Metallica has passed Spinal Tap proportions of caricatured uncool, but that’s rarely a roadblock for outrageously self-absorbed egos.