Since he can’t score a hit these days no matter what transparent stunt he pulls, alleged kid-toucher Michael Jackson is resorting to re-recording his old hits with current flashes in the pan in hopes that he might get the money train a-rolling again. Neverland is looking pretty sad these days. Fergie, Will.I.Am. and Kanye West are all involved to some extent in the 25th anniversary version of Thriller, but Jackson has too much to overcome to get back in people’s good graces. Child molestation charges are not easily forgotten, even by America’s Cheetos-stuffing, ADD core. And Thriller 2008 is such sad, last-gasp attempt to reclaim any sort of musical viability. Sure, it’ll get press and then swiftly tank. Lightening doesn’t strike twice, especially for fruitcake kid-touchers with disintegrating faces.