Celebrity fighting has infiltrated the micro-blogosphere. Gasp! A Twitter war broke out yesterday between fat, talentless gossip hag Perez Hilton and mouthy British pop singer Lily Allen, who’s newest record hit stores last week. I suppose my bias is transparent. Poor miss Allen was reduced to trading barbs with Hilton, having had her goat gotten with a few pointed tweets. Allen hastily made way to the nearest computer device to block Hilton from further retort but not before she lambasted Hilton as a “bitter lonely old queen.” Thousands of Allen’s followers breathed a sigh of relief that that “little parasite” wouldn’t be interrupting their idol’s insightful, real-time chronicle of her superior work as a wearer of dresses, a drinker of drinks, and a singer of songs. Oxford comma, bitches. [via KFL]