Reading this interview between The Guardian and George Michael, one comes away with the impression that Michael is kind of a paranoid loon. And not just your typically famous, crazy-person-musician-type loon, either. This goes beyond most self-absorbed celebrities and their notoriously dysfunctional behavior. I mean, I knew Michael was a bit off, having repeatedly seen tabloid shots of him slumped over in his car, not to mention his myriad run-ins with the law, but this guy just doesn’t seem to have a handle on how to function in the world. He does an inordinate amount of drugs for someone who claims he’s 100% A-ok, but that’s not even the crux of it. He just comes across as sort of creepy and, well, not right. The author of the piece, Simon Hattenstone, is vividly aware of Michael’s foibles and seems to point out the inconsistencies with a healthy dose of cynicism.

Despite, Michael’s flagrant delusions about his lifestyle, he does have a sense of humor, particularly in regards to other people’s impressions of his personal life. On Elton John’s much-publicized concern for his health: “He will not be happy until I bang on his door in the middle of the night saying, ‘Please, please, help me, Elton. Take me to rehab.’ It’s not going to happen.” On Bono’s supposed concern: “As if Bono gives a shit what I do with my private life…”

Even though he is more than candid about his lifestyle choices, Michael is strangely secretive about his future musical endeavors, refusing to comment on even what style it might be. My best guess after reading this interview is stoner rock.